House of Geekiness

This have never been more true

My house is in shambles and I literally could barely walk when I woke up yesterday. Thank goodness for the Sabbath Day. I've never been so grateful for a day of rest or needed it more! Preparations for the move are stressful but there's progress. Not sure if it's enough progress, but I'm hoping it's enough to get us out of here on time. Between prepping for the moving sale and trying to sell/give away more than half of our possessions, packing, cleaning, kids having massive temper tantrums and/or throwing up, trying to sell my van within the next three days, and not seeing my husband or puppy for a month now, my mind and body are a wreck.

A month ago, even though our trip to California to visit family was not what we'd expected (we found out that my father-in-law has cancer and decided me needed to come live with him. Read about it here.), I came back from the trip exhausted but doing a LOT better mentally. I'm not sure if it was the change in elevation (studies have shown that a lower elevation and more oxygen to the brain can help with depression) or just the change and prospects of a new start, but I returned mentally recharged.

That didn't last as long as I hoped. The stress that I mentioned before, especially with my physical limitations and having to rely on the help of others, has been difficult.

I've had lots of support from family and friends and was able to hire some nice ladies to come help clean and pack, but there are still things that only I can do (like deciding what to take with us). One of the hardest parts has been that my youngest has not been dealing with any of this well. His therapist is having him tested for Autism (which seems obvious now when I look back on the signs). He is extremely obsessive and anxious, very rigid thinking, and change or any kind, whether it's a variance from the daily routine to chicken nuggets instead of chicken sandwiches for dinner sets off a massive fit. We're talking screaming, hitting, pouting, hiding, running away, and saying that he wished he was dead or better off dead. You can probably imagine what a change like moving out of state, when he has no memory of living anyplace else, is doing to him....

My youngest and his "mildly grumpy" look

While writing this just now, I asked him if he was ready for his appointment (testing this morning with the therapist) but his shoes are missing. I asked him brother to help him look (another pair or eyes, you know?) and my youngest got really upset. He started yelling, about how I didn't trust him and slapped my arm. After his time out, I explained that it's not a matter of trust but that sometimes we all miss things, even grown ups, and it never hurts to have help. He still didn't believe me. I found his shoes a few minutes later, exactly where both he and his brother had already looked.

My youngest, still not that thrilled. I think it was because they gave him the "wrong" Lego set for his birthday (which was still a Lego set he wanted, by the way, but not the one he expected to get)

I am so thankful for all the love and support I've had! A lot of people don't understand depression, and at times I don't quite get it myself.

I've pushed myself past limits lately and made things worse, but at times I've proven that I can do more than I believed I could. I'm hoping this move will be all we need it to be. We've already seen some huge improvements in Erik, who stayed behind to care for his father.

A special thank you to Jennifer M. Boyle, who keeps leaving me encouraging messages like this:

*Read next update here.

My goals

I want to have energy to spend time and actually do activities with my family.

I want to be able to be physically active. I’m not saying I plan on running marathons, but being able to exercise and do basic housecleaning on a daily basis would be nice.

I want my mind to feel less foggy all the time so I can do my job well and enjoy being in the profession I love.

I want to be healthy and be at a healthy weight.

~~I want my life back!~~ I will look for the best in my life and realize what I truly have, always striving to make it better.
I will accept myself as I am.

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Den in 2008 vs July 2016

Our dad/granpda/father-in-law, Den, was the sole caretaker for his disabled wife for years (literally, since before I met him in 2001) until she passed away last year.

Donna (left) and her mother, Myrtle (right)

Amazingly, during that time, he also cared for his 99 year old mother-in-law when she was unable to live on her own. This angel of a man endured back breaking labor and fatigue for years, always giving a brief shrug to our concerns. He insisted that Erik and Ryan (his two sons) continued their education and lives in Utah as planned.

When Donna, passed away, Den fell into a deep depressive state. Us living in Utah while he lives in California, we could only guess that things were not going very well. We had no idea. Over the phone, he'd mentioned that he had some health problems and was lonely but... We had a strong feeling that we needed to see him to really know what was going on, especially since he's not one to complain.

Den last month (before he lost another 10 or so lbs) and his newest grandbaby

This last week, we finally were able to come visit. What we saw left us in shock! Just a shell of the tall, Haiwiian shirt-wearing man we know and love, he'd lost more than 20 lbs in the past 2 months alone (when he didn't have anything spare to lose). His strong back is hunched over, his cheeks hollow, one lung has shut down almost completely, and he's barely able to eat. On top of it all, he told me that it was all his own fault for not taking better care of himself when he was so sad his wife was gone.

It didn't take Erik and I long to decide that we need to move our family of five here to take care of him.

Our dad literally gave his good health to care for his wife until her dying day. It's time we took care of him!

Our children, 3 of 5 of Den's grandchildren

That's where you come in. We're willing and able to care for him and help him recover his health but getting there is financially impossible for our young family. Please consider donating or sharing this to help us relocate so we can give this wonderful man the care he deserves and allow him to be nearer to some of his grandchildren!

*Read next update here.

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I finally got to see Captain America: Civil War, so of course it's time for another Spoiler Free Review and Parental Guide. :)

I had mixed feelings going into this because movies like Iron Man 2, 3 were really disappointing, and, while Avengers 2 was pretty good, it wasn't as good as I was hoping it would be. Captain America: Civil War actually surprised me!

While it wasn't exactly the party/dance off I would have loved (it was really dramatic and action heavy) it was still entertaining.

Captain America: Civil War Spoiler Free Review

Overall, I'd say that Captain America: Civil War had it all: action, humor, drama, fun, etc. Definitely worth watching in the theater!

The Good

While this movie was full of drama (it had to be for all the Avengers to be fighting each other), the comedy had me laughing like crazy.
They tied in elements from other movies. This is something I really love about Marvel movies—they're so good at incorporating different characters, events, references, etc., making it all one continuing series and a cohesive universe.
It had heart. Without spoiling it, I will say that the reasons behind their Civil War and the emotions we see/feel throughout the movie are compelling.

New Characters. While some of the new characters were underplayed and much too briefly included, I absolutely loved Black Panther. He's been one of my favorites for years (I even named one of our pets T'Challa after him), so I was nervous but excited to see what they did with him. He is so much of what I was hoping for!

I also loved Spider-Man! It actually made me look forward to seeing his upcoming movie (which is a big deal for me because Sony's had me Spider-Manned-out for a while now with all their garbage). He was funny, lovable, and more true to the comic version—exactly what I wanted to see in the last few Spider-Mans with one exception (see spoiled part below my Parental Guide).

The Bad

Too much action. I know it's a superhero movie, lots of action is a given, but there was just too much fighting and not enough plot.
A bit redundant in parts. Again, It felt like they squeezed in a bit of story here and there and focused on the action instead of plot and character development. Not too much more I can say about that without spoiling it (which I will do below the Parental Guide).

Parental Guide

Language: There was quite a bit more profanity in this movie compared to the other Avengers movies. While most of it is minor, there are several instances of heavier profanity, especially the "S word".

Violence: Pretty heavy on the violence. I'm not letting my younger two kids watch it, but I think it's fine for my 12 year old. The violence was more realistic since it was all human vs human style fighting, including a lot of punching—you see a lot of black eyes, bloodied lips, etc. The violence is even a bit scary at times. This might be especially hard for younger children to watch as you see heroes fighting each other and don't know how far they will go to stop each other.

Sexual Content: Unlike the Iron Man movies, there was no sex or sexual content in Captain America: Civil War, which I really appreciated.

Warning: Spoilers Ahead!

Can we just take a moment to appreciate the humor in this movie? I mean, half the time, I was having trouble breathing because I was laughing so much!

And Spider-Man? Ahaha! LOVED him. For the most part, his personality was spot on:

But what the heck was with Spidey not knowing Star Wars?? Everything else about him was perfect but our geeky Peter Parker would know Empire Strikes Back by heart. I know they were trying to be funny but that's one really shot holes in the credibility of their Spider-Man.

And what was up with Aunt May being like 30?? Not cool, Marvel. Not cool.

LOVED this part but decent person would tell someone that the love of their life had just died via text message??! Would've been so easy to have a quick phone call or even for him to pick up the phone, then show him at the funeral. Grrrr!

Also, Peggy just died and he's getting together with her NIECE??? What the crud! Give us some time to move on here!

Having Crossbones in the beginning was kind of fun, but it just seemed like he knew way too much without us getting to know him first. He almost defeated the Avengers and we didn't even know why until they blew him up...

Poor Baron Zemo! He was quite diabolical, as he should have been, but they spent way too much time focusing on action scenes instead of giving him the character development that he needed. Zemo is one of Cap's major villains and he seemed more like an afterthought to me. Don't get me wrong, by the end of the movie, where T'Challa was talking to him, I did feel for the guy, but they just could have done so much more! It also seemed like a huge let down that he just killed the other super soldiers instead of using them for his cause, as was his M.O. in the movie...but that would probably have made for an even longer action-focused movie.

Finally, we have Stan Lee's traditional cameo. Am I the only one who thought it seemed really forced? It seems like it should have been funny but I just didn't enjoy it.

What are your thoughts about Captain America: Civil War?

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I have the absolute WORST time finding swimwear that I like. It's so hard to find something cute and not too revealing, so finding something geeky is usually out of the question.

I mean, why is it that people assume that cosplay or geek fashion equals slutty?? Sex really does sell, especially in Hollywood, but what about normal people? What about those of us who aren't celebrities, who just want to enjoy our fandoms and be ourselves?

The fact is that, with few exceptions, designers and vendors have catered to a small demographic—making women's clothes for the few who feel they need to dress like strippers to boost their self-esteem (and the boys who drool over them).

It took me a long time to understand why my mom didn't like comic books or even some of the comic-based cartoons I loved, like the 90's X-men. Even as a kid, I was drawn to into the comic book world with its enthralling plots and characters. It took becoming a mom to fully understand that she didn't have anything against comic books themselves, but, rather, their graphic portrayals of women.

What do these skin-tight clothes and over-sized chests (heck, even the men in comics are ridiculously muscle-bound and unrealistically proportioned!) tell our kids about their body image or how they should view others? Do we have to look overly sexual to appear strong and confident?

DC SuperHero Girls

That's why the new trend I'm seeing has me so excited. Between the new DC SuperHero Girls (pictured above) and Star Trek TNG swim suits from ThinkGeek, we're seeing new content and fashion that I can share with my kids. They even have matching dresses!

Check them out:

Aren't they cute??! One-piece swimsuits, available in red, gold, and blue (for command, operations, and science uinforms), ranging from sizes Small to 2X.

This long sleeved Swim Shirt, based on Deanna Troi's lavendar jumpsuit from season 2 and 3, is not only adorable but excellent protection from the sun! I don't know about you, but my shoulders and back always get burned when I spend a long day poolside.

Long-sleeve Cover-up Romper

They also have a bunch of other cute and modest Star Trek clothes:

Star Trek Kaleidoscope Skirt

Star Trek Kaleidoscope Dress

Star Trek TNG: A-line Dress

Star Trek TNG Starfleet Dress

I was totally gonna leave it there, but I made the mistake of going back to look at more of their Star Trek gear and found these! Oh my goodness I'm in love. I SOOOO NEED these: