I took the kids swimming at the Provo Rec Center yesterday. They had so much fun, which was important to me because we haven't gotten to do much so far this summer.
The Rec Center is amazing, but the air was so humid and the heated pools were too warm for me to cool off much. So, even though I didn't swim much (literally 2 walking laps with the current in the small lazy river and sitting around in the water for a bit), I left with my knees hurting (from my previous injury, see my last blog post) and feeling like I'd been swimming laps. Heat and humidity always make me super sick like this (so exhausted that I'm almost falling asleep sitting up), but I was hoping it wouldn't be so bad because of the water.
Today, I'm really feeling the effects of it. I woke up hurting literally from head to toe. If you've ever felt feverish and had the all-over muscle/joint pain that comes with it, that's a lot like what I'm feeling. Even my eyes hurt. I'm still really tired even though I slept for about ten hours last night. My mood is terrible. The thought of doing anything (even writing this blog post) is exhausting, and I'm having trouble being around people. My poor kids, especially our youngest, want to spend time with me, but I'm only able to focus on them for a minute or two at a time before I need a break.
But you know what? It was worth it. This is what my life is right now. I have to carefully measure cost vs benefit for everything I do. Before we left for the pool, I knew this was a likely outcome, but my kids really needed this. I'll have to spend a day or two recovering, but my kids are worth it.
I want to have energy to spend time and actually do activities with my family.
I want to be able to be physically active. I’m not saying I plan on running marathons, but being able to exercise and do basic housecleaning on a daily basis would be nice.
I want my mind to feel less foggy all the time so I can do my job well and enjoy being in the profession I love.
I want to be healthy and be at a healthy weight.
I want my life back!
I’ll post more later, I think I’ve done enough ranting for one night. Coming Soon: A possible light at the end of the tunnel?
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